Should I Allow My 8-Year-Old Son to Sleep 12–13 Hours a Night? (Post-Illness and Puberty Onset)

Welcome
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Hi all,

I’m looking for advice or insight on my 8 (nearly 9)-year-old son’s sleep habits, especially in light of some serious health issues he experienced this past year.

Back in September, he became very unwell. I suspected scarlet fever due to the symptoms and rash, but the doctor initially dismissed it as a viral infection. My son is of mixed ethnicity (white and Asian), but I believe the doctors assessed him as white, and I wonder if they may have missed signs that present differently on darker skin. After nearly seven weeks of high fevers, extreme fatigue, and several doctor/hospital visits, the skin on his hands and body began peeling. At that point, the doctor confirmed what I’d suspected all along — it had been scarlet fever.

By then, he had already recovered on his own, so we declined antibiotics. He had heart and general health checks done, and everything came back fine. However, since that illness, he’s not been the same.

He now experiences:

  • Frequent migraines
  • Neck and back pain
  • Lethargy and brain fog
  • Stomach upset
  • Emotional fluctuations

He was admitted to A&E at one point and had an MRI, CT scan, and full blood work — all normal. I have a family history of fibromyalgia, which I shared with the doctors. I myself started suffering with Fibro symptoms from the age of about 6 which is documented by the doctors.

In addition to this, he appears to be entering puberty early: he’s growing quickly, constantly hungry, and becoming more emotional. His sleep has changed drastically — he struggles to fall asleep before 10pm onwards (even with melatonin) and needs about 12 to 13 hours of sleep to feel okay.

We home educate, so we have flexibility with his routine, but my question is:

Should I let him sleep this long, or should I try to implement a stricter sleep schedule to help his body adjust?

I don’t want to interfere with his healing process or growth, but I also want to make sure I’m not enabling habits that could make things worse long-term.

Any thoughts, personal experiences, or medical insights would be hugely appreciated.

Thanks so much in advance.

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I think in light of his recent illness you should allow him to sleep all he wants. I remember my mother telling me that when I was young I had a very bad virus and after I was recovering I slept a lot and my mom asked the doctor should she wake me to eat and the doctor said no let her sleep all she wants and then you can feed her. The doctor felt that sleep was more important than food.

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Hi there, Thank you for sharing your son’s story — it sounds like you’ve been through a lot, and you’re doing a great job supporting him. It’s completely understandable to have questions about his sleep, especially given everything he’s experiencing.

Right now, the best approach is to keep a consistent sleep routine that helps his body rest and recover. Allowing flexibility while encouraging regular bed and wake times can really support his healing and overall well-being. Since every child is different, and given his health history, it’s important to keep his doctor involved. They can provide personalized guidance on what’s normal and whether any adjustments to his sleep schedule are needed.

You’re clearly very attentive, and that’s a huge strength. Wishing you and your son all the best as you navigate this! :blue_heart: